By: Michael Rogers, DDS
This Topic Originally Appeared on PankeyGram.Org. Dr. Rogers granted ignitedds permission to share with our readers.
Near my dental office, there’s a small strip center that includes a realty group and a small church that creates a significant daily line of cars that go through a drive-through window. Cars line up waiting their turn, and the line is so long the cars snake through the parking lot, out into the street, with hazard lights flashing.
I have a friend who loves to create stories about what is going on in strangers’ lives. Fantasized from some level of observation, my friend has captured what this drive-through is all about. He believes that because the drive-through is adjacent to a church, you can pull up to the window and be given a donut along with a prayer. It’s a small ministry that helps people have a better day.
That’s not a bad narrative but no real basis for the story. I say that as the line of cars grows longer, the prayers gain power. I get a warm feeling of their impact on others.
Trying To Find The Whys In Our Dental Offices
We often catch ourselves making up stories about the patients as well, such as;
- Why didn’t a patient show up for their appointment?
- Why didn’t they accept a treatment plan?
- Why someone won’t pay a bill?
Although these are rooted in some level of observation, often they can lead to unnecessary judgments since they are tales nonetheless.
To avoid unnecessary judgments, I and my dental team try to reframe these 3 questions in three more understanding ways;
- What do I know?
- What do I think I know?
- What do I want to know?
We practice this in our office. I encourage my team to not live in “what I think I know.” This state of mind too often leads to creating stories that reflect a judgment. If I hear a team member begin to create a narrative based on a circumstance with the phrase “I think…,” I try to politely make them aware of what they are doing. They most certainly recognize when I do it and politely let me know. I just grin to hide my disappointment in myself. Maybe someday, I’ll say, “Thank you.”
Embracing Relationship-Based Dentistry
In relationship-based practices, we have such marvelous opportunities to help people be healthier. Asking questions about what we’d like to know and sometimes creating self-discovery for the patient as well.
We often get repeated moments to connect and learn with each other. The need to make up stories is dissolved when we get to hear their story. Sometimes that story is fun, other times hard. We get to walk along that story with them. What a gift to live a life in that connection!
Excited to build a relationship-based dental practice? Visit The Pankey Institute if you’re looking to grasp the behavioral skills highly necessary in dentistry in addition to clinical expertise. Strengthen your relationships with patients by embracing different communication styles.
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