By Maggie Augustyn, DDS
This has weighed me on for 192 months: the reason for my longtime fear of becoming friends with women. We all have been aware of the fact that there are some women who can be cruel, mean, selfish and destructive. They pay no attention, especially as they have a hand at breaking us apart. Other women, very special women, live rebuilding what their predecessors destroyed.
More than 15 years ago, someone I considered to be my best friend in dental school walked away from me. Abruptly, she sent me an email stating: “I no longer want to be your friend.” Without looking back, she passively mentioned that I wasn’t a good friend. I wasn’t a good friend for skipping out on lectures, presentations and having an overall absence in social activities. Little did she know, though was later explained, that my not being present was due to a lifelong battle with depression. In those times, rather than opening up and having long drawn-out conversations about my fantasies of suicide, it was much easier to just ‘skip out’ on social obligations, go home and sleep my life away. Depression, in the beginning of the millennium, was still considered a badge of shame and represented weakness. It remained my absolute secret. Back then it did, and today is no longer.
My going home early to cry and to scream after clinic, of course, was taken to be a great faux pax, and could not be forgiven. My past due explanation was not only difficult to believe but also seemed like an excuse. How could I possibly be depressed, when I had spent the day laughing?
Note: This article was originally published on Dental Entrepreneur Woman. You can read the entire article by clicking here.
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